Monday 10 November 2008

The movie will begin in 5 moments...

I learned two things this weekend:

Thanks to years of listening to Gift Grub on Today FM, I am incapable of sitting in a cinema without saying "In fact ah...." when the Irish National Federation Against Copyright Theft (INFACT) notice is displayed. (I doubt I'm the only one)

It is a more difficult than you might think to pee standing up while wearing a crash helmet.


fatmammycat said...

Why on earth would a helmet tricksify the peeing process?

The Bad Ambassador said...

Thinking about it now FMC, its actually the combination of kinky leather bike trousers over jeans and a crash helmet which makes the process more complicated.

You see, unless one is willing to go about the place with moist, pungent trousers, it is crucial to ensure that the peeing apparatus is fully outside all garments. (I don't think you need -or want - the finer points of this explained).

Unfortunately, the piece of the crash helmet (being careful to always use the word crash as a prefix here) designed to protect the gnashers and jaw is perfectly placed to restrict ones viewing of the desired area. (i.e. the area I desire to see - as opposed to an area desired by others. I don't know about that and I don't like to ask).

The only alternative, short of removing the crash helmet of course, is to thrust the pelvic region out at a most unnatural (when peeing) angle.

fatmammycat said...